So back home last week, I got the same question everyone gets when they go back home.
“So tell me about your friends. Are you making any? Who do you hang out with?”
Normal question, right? But I always feel really awkward answering it.
“Well…we hang out with each other mainly. And then we hang out with the JVs/FJVs (former Jesuit Volunteers) a fair amount. And we see John’s family a lot. We both are friendly with a few people from school, but we don’t really hang out with them.”
Truth be told, we don’t have a ton of friends. And quite a few of the ones we do have are moving away/have recently moved away this summer! Part of me feels a little self-conscious about this. We don’t have roommates (besides each other) like my sisters do. One of my friends back home is always buzzing about this friend or that, this new guy she met, etc. And really – our circle is pretty small.
It’s not “I just moved to a new city” small. We know people through work and school. I run into people I know at the grocery store. We go to parties, barbecues, potlucks occasionally. But we don’t have a “hey let’s get the gang together for the usual this Friday” or anything like that.
And while that would be great, to be honest, I’m pretty okay with where we are. We’re enjoying figuring out our new married life out together, and after two years of JVC, it’s nice to have some peace and quiet. I keep in pretty good contact with a few friends from college and JVC. The kindergartners who live in our apartment complex are always really excited to throw a frisbee around with us. And really, we hang out with family a lot.
What did we do for Christmas break? Flew home to visit my folks and then to get out of the house, drove to N.C. to visit my grandparents. What about Spring Break? Salt Lake City by ourselves, LA to see an FJV housemate, and San Diego to see John’s aunt, uncle, and cousin. What’d we do for Memorial Day ? Okay, well John worked but the day before we stayed up at his family’s cabin. With his family. And some snow. Today – John’s off to a good-bye party for his Uncle who is about to take his solemn vows with the Carmelites.
So maybe we’re lame for not having a Friends or How I Met Your Mother style group of friends. (And don’t get me wrong, one day I’d like to have that). But we’re happy spending our breaks visiting family and old roommates. It may not be the most glamorous lifestyle, but the truth is – its hard to meet people after college. But we have a great group of people we enjoy and can rely on. Even if we’re related to most of them. And did the same volunteer program as the rest. No one is going to base a TV show around our fab 20-something lives, but that’s fine by me.